Back to School Tips

I was watching Breakfast television this morning and they had a brief segment on ‘mom blogs’. The host was so perky so early in the morning. She says: “lots of stuff for moms . . . back to school tips . . .”

Back to school tips?

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What’s hard about back to school? Go get some school supplies a couple of sweaters for the cold weather and off they go. But for those of you that need a list here you go:

Here are my Tips:

1) Getting up in the morning is hard after a lazy summer. If your child is having a hard time getting up in the early morning dump a small glass of ice water on their head. Not only will that wake said child up but will also wet their heads so they can comb their messy bed head hair out.

2) Getting dressed. I never put clothes away. They are either in the dirty laundry hamper, piled in the laundry basket or in the dryer. The frantic search for clothing in the morning is a good way for your children to get some exercise. Running up and down the basement stairs to the laundry room is good for their young hearts. And while they’re down there they can clean the cat litter and bring dinner up from the freezer.

3) Signing of day planners and permission slips. I taught my son to forge my signature as soon as he learned to spell. Please. They will do it anyway so you might as well teach them and save you the hassle.

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4) Homework: Set a routine, you pour yourself a glass of wine and sit at the kitchen table with your laptop or desk and pc wherever your computer is. Make sure your child is close by and get him/her to open the school books while you surf the internet for the latest celebrity gossip. If you are asked a question you can quickly google it and be a good smart, know it all parent. (who remembers how to divide fractions anyway?)

5) Bedtime. By the time you are finished your bottle of wine and have had your fill of celebrity gossip and trashy t.v. you will want to pass out and go to bed. Your child will eventually get to bed on his own. Really.